How To Get Unstuck: A Lucky 13 Suggestions To Get You Past That Impasse

At times, our professional lives can provide moments of uncertainty—job loss, a promotion we’re not getting for reasons we don’t understand, a feeling of general malaise, or any other number of reasons that leave us feeling that things just aren’t right. Even in the midst of seemingly perfect scenarios, we may find ourselves feeling stuck, yearning for a sense of renewal or perhaps just “something more.” This sense of being at an impasse, a standstill, can be disheartening, but it’s a necessary crisis for personal growth and a stage almost all of us go through at one point or another. In this post, we’ll talk about how to get unstuck.

Facing crises, we often persist with old strategies until we realize they no longer serve us. Recognizing the feelings of impasse and embracing them as a catalyst for development is crucial. It’s not about failure; it’s a reminder of where we are in our journey.

Ultimately, feeling stuck is a common human experience. However, navigating these impasses can lead to profound personal growth and transformation. Understanding the underlying mechanisms and taking intentional steps can guide us out of the rut and into a space of clarity and progress. Here are some suggestions for helping you get unstuck:

1. Acknowledge the Impasse. The first step is acknowledgment. Accept that being stuck doesn’t define your entirety. It’s a temporary state, a checkpoint, not a verdict on your capabilities. Recognize that work will be required to get past this stage but that it’s possible. Commit yourself to the process and begin working through it.
2. Embrace Self-Reflection. Pause and look inward. Dive into your thoughts, emotions, and past experiences. Acknowledge your intuition; often, it holds vital clues and solutions. Engage with trusted others if helpful, as they may be seeing things that you’re not seeing yourself. Assessments are often helpful, particularly those that push you to think about your most important values and motivators.¹
3. Unravel the Past. Sometimes, our present impasse is linked to unresolved past experiences. As we age, we carry both strengths and wounds with us, and confronting these can be a transformative experience. Unspoken parental demands or distorted self-images may drive impasses, hindering our pursuit of fulfilling work and relationships. Revisit old wounds, confront them, and allow healing to take place. Consider working with a coach or even a therapist if needed.²
4. Silence the Inner Critic. Carl Jung posited that societal roles narrow our identity, leading to a conscious ego that may inhibit other facets of our being. Our internalized irrational voice, whether called the superego or inner critic, exacerbates our feelings of inadequacy. Recognizing and disengaging from the critic is crucial for moving forward. Recognize and challenge the voice of self-doubt and criticism within you. Learn to differentiate it from your genuine aspirations and desires.³
5. Consider External Influences. External voices often amplify our internal critic, especially in societies that prioritize financial success or status over relational achievements. Identify the voices and expectations of significant stakeholders in your life. Recognize whose dreams you’re chasing – yours or someone else’s.
6. Practice Free Attention. Cultivate a state of alert presence or mindfulness, devoid of distractions. This intense focus often allows for the reception of new information and intuitive insights. If needed, separate yourself from your day-to-day, such as by taking a retreat or even a long walk or hike.
7. Engage in the One Hundred Jobs Exercise. Using a list of 100 jobs, select the 12 you find most appealing. Identify themes and tensions among your preferences. Dive deeper into identified themes and tensions and decode their underlying messages and significance.
8. Discover Deep Interests. Evaluate your fundamental interests and strengths, determining what truly drives and fulfills you in various facets of life. Here, again, assessments such as Strong Interest or Clifton Strengths may be helpful.⁴
9. Reflect on Your Past Work and Life Choices. Recall moments aligned with your deepest passions and those where you felt disconnected. Evaluate your current situation against these insights. What’s present? What’s missing?
10. Recognize Social Motivations. Identify your primary social needs – power, belonging, achievement – and their influence on your decisions.
11. Uncover Dominant Motivations. Determine if your actions align with your dominant motivation. Assess whether the roles you inhabit genuinely resonate with your core motivations and, if not, what you’re otherwise seeking.
12. Map Your Insights. Create a visual map of your interests, motivations, and tensions. Reflect on each element and consider changes for greater alignment. Also, identify the conditions you want to avoid and write them down.
13. Embrace Action. Finally, embrace the power of choice. Reflect on competing alternatives and their implications. Allow feelings to guide your decision-making process. Then, commit to action with near- and longer-term steps. Share your plan with others if that will help you stay true to it.⁵

Navigating impasses is a journey toward making choices, taking action, and living comfortably at the border of uncertainty, ambiguity, and dynamic tensions.

Notes:

1. PathWise will soon be offering a values assessment. Check here for availability.
2. Our leadership coaches can help you if you’re feeling stuck. Click here for more info.
3. Carol Dweck’s work on growth vs. fixed mindsets and Brené Brown’s work on vulnerability and shame may be helpful in putting your inner critic in its proper place. PathWise offers book summaries* of both women’s work, as well as a profile on Brené Brown.
4. PathWise offers Clifton Strengths, supplemented with coaching sessions. Click here for more info.
5. For further guidance, check out Timothy Butler’s book, Getting Unstuck. PathWise offers a summary of it here*.

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